Your gaze once filled with adoration and love now sears me with scorn.
When you grab me, your fist is a very real lump at my throat.
I don’t know what to say.
You speak, but I cannot make out your words.
I am more concerned with the grimace your mouth has rearranged itself into.
And your lips actually tremble with barely contained anger.
I am not afraid of you, of your rage.
I am only afraid that I will still love you after you are done.
Why is it that we’re always waiting for something? How many clichés do we have to hear about Father Time and time being of the essence before we actually pay attention that it’s true? But time is not the only thing that waits for no one. That “friend” that has a crush on you isn’t waiting either. You know the friend I’m talking about – the one who’s smart, funny, tall, kind, chivalrous and down to earth. There’s a reason why he’s not your Man but what is it? We’re waiting. For what? Oh, just choose from any number of the million reasons we have. Maybe he lives far away, or perhaps he has a lot of female friends and who wants to deal with that? Maybe we have a boyfriend who really doesn’t treat us right but we’re still holding on to him (weird, I know) and our friend is the one we turn to and talk about our guy problems. Maybe we’re waiting for “Mr. Perfect” but he’s late in arriving. Meanwhile our friend is always there. He’s the shoulder to lean on, he’s the dinner date when no one else wants to go, and he’s the one you call when you can’t sleep. He’s such a FRIEND that you can’t fathom him being your man…until he finds a woman and is no longer on the market. That’s when you have your moment of clarity. You thought he’d always be there but now he’s found someone and you realize that maybe, just maybe you missed out on a chance because you were waiting…
Confessions of a Thinkaholic 